This week the topic for my class was “staying emotionally connected”. Every couple goes through times of strife, and my husband and I are no exception. However, as I read through Gottman’s book and went through all of the exercises for this week, I feel very blessed to know that my husband and I are very emotionally connected; we are basically connected at the hip. Again, that is not to say that we are without fault in our marriage.
I particularly have some work to do, but I think the things I need to work on are indirectly related to my relationship with my husband. In Goddard’s book, Drawing Heaven Into Your Marriage, he talks about how having faith in Jesus Christ will help your marriage. I know that I have a Savior who loves me and suffered for me. However, just as James 2:26 states, “Faith without works is dead.” I personally could do a lot more to show my faith and develop a closer relationship with Jesus Christ.
In this chapter on faith, Goddard quoted President Ezra Taft Benson who stated, “When we put God first, all other things fall into their proper place or drop out of our lives. Our love of the Lord will govern the claim for our affections, the demands on our time, the interests we pursue, and the order of our priorities. We should put God ahead of everyone else in our lives.” (Goddard, 2009. P. 58) I’ve always believed this to be true. There have been times in my life that I have put Him first, and everything worked itself out. Though now amid all of my stress, I have neglected to put this principle into practice. I wonder how much different the last few weeks would have been if I had been doing this all along.
Goddard further explained, “ When we have vibrant faith in the Lord Jesus Christ, we know that the irritations and challenges of marriage are blessings intended to develop our character… As we turn from the ways of the natural man, to the ways of Christ, we will respond to our challenges differently. Instead of judging our partner, we will invite Christ to soften our hearts and fill us with goodness. No challenges or differences in marriage can thwart the work of God-given charity.” (Goddard, 2009. P. 59-60)
It takes more than just faith in Christ; it requires “vibrant faith” in Him to acquire “God-given charity”. This is my new goal, to have vibrant faith in Christ so that I can develop a more Christ-like love for my husband and everyone I come in contact with. I need to put Him first in my life. It’s a challenge to do so with a new baby, school, work, chores, etc. But like I said earlier, I have put this into practice before and had amazing, faith-building results. When we give our time to Him, He seems to give us enough time in the day to figure everything else out. It really is incredible.
I like the analogy of marriage being a triangle. Christ is at the center, highest point. As each partner draws closer to the Savior, they draw closer to each other. That is my hope today, this week, and for the rest of my life, that I will have vibrant faith and draw closer to my Savior, so that I will in turn draw closer to my husband.
Goddard, H. Wallace. (2009). Drawing Heaven into Your Marriage. Utah: Joymap Publishing.
Gottman, John Mordechai, and Nan Silver. (1999). The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work. New York: Crown.
No comments:
Post a Comment